Go to a nice restarant and order a steak. When it arrives, start eating it like usual. Then halfway through the meal, slip an Alka-Seltzer tablet in your mouth. When you feel it starting to fizz, jump up out of your seat, flail your arms, tear at your hair, and start screaming that your food just gave you Mad Cow Disease. Then fall down, twitch, and act like you've slipped into a coma.
If you do this just right, you're guaranteed to win a multi-million dollar settlement.
Sunday, January 11, 2004
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