Showing posts with label Fun with torture. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fun with torture. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Cheney Staying in Shape?

Police in Mexico say that they have found 12 bodies near the town of La Huacana. It is believed the victims were first subjected to extensive torture.

No word on where Dick Cheney was at the time.

Thursday, July 09, 2009

Is Mexico Torturing Prisoners?

Several human rights groups have accused Mexico of torture in its pursuit of drug traffickers. Additionally, the Mexican military is accused of forced disappearances and illegal searches.

If these charges are true, then Mexico's actions are disturbing, despicable, and not worthy of a democratic nation that supposedly lives by the rules of a civilized nation.

In other words, welcome to the club, Mexico!!

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Proof That Twittering Is More Evil Than Blogging

Friday, May 29, 2009

No Matter How Much We Try to Scrub....

Thursday, May 28, 2009

About Those Alleged Photos from Iraqi Prisons....

A couple of weeks ago, President Obama decided to block the release of prisoner abuse photos from Iraq. The decision proved controversial, with some people accusing the President of reneging on campaign promises to release any such images of abuse. Obama, on the other hand, now says that releasing them would only serve to inflame hatred of the United States and therefor further endanger American troops. The specific content of the pictures remained unknown.

Now a British newspaper is reporting that those photos depict scenes of rape and other sexual abuses.

Even if that's true, how do we know those photos are from the inside of an Iraqi prison and NOT from the inside of, say, a Catholic school?

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Three Wrongs Make a Right

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Thursday, May 07, 2009

What? No Waterboard?

An auction house in New York city is planning to sell a number of torture devices from the 16th century. The items includes things like a table rack designed to stretch the human body and a tongue tearer which, well, does just that.

Coincidentally, former vice president Cheney has reportedly cashed in his 401k and is enroute to New York.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Getting Them to Talk

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Lynne Cheney Falls Ill

Lynne Cheney fainted yesterday afternoon and was taken to a Philadelphia area hospital. It remains unclear why she collapsed.

Her husband, former vice president Dick Cheney, has generously offered to torture his wife until she begins cooperating with doctors.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Biden, Cheney Meet

Just a few weeks ago, then vice presidential candidate Joe Biden called Dick Cheney "the most dangerous vice president we've had."

With the campaign now over, and in an effort to demonstrate that there are no hard feelings, the two men met last night at the official vice presidential residence in DC. Cheney then invited the incoming vice president to go "hunting" in the backyard.

Curiously, Biden hasn't been seen since.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Monday, May 12, 2008

Someone Give This Man A Dictionary

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Do As I Say, Not As I Do

Have you ever had to perform the Heimlich maneuver on yourself? I just had to do exactly that, and now there are Whopper and onion ring bits all over my monitor.

The reason I almost choked on my food was this story about a recent report released by the United States. It accuses China of--GASP!!!!--torturing prisoners!

Coincidentally, the report on China comes just days after President Bush vetoed a congressional bill that would have banned the CIA from using waterboarding against its own prisoners.

If irony were a dog, it would be biting Bush in the ass right about now.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Another Inconvenient Truth

Canada has added the United States to a list of nations that torture and abuse foreign prisoners. The list, intended only for Canadian diplomats, was accidentally given to Amnesty International.

This is outrageous and shameful. We need to find out who has spreading these vicious lies by kidnapping a few Canadians and asking them. And if they refuse to tell us, then we should start yanking their fingernails out one by one.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Does This Mean I Get To Keep My Fingernails?

The Hollywood writers' strike has claimed its first major prime-time casualty. Fox's popular 24 was set to start in January. As it stands now, however, the show's producers will only be able to complete eight episodes. Rather than air those eight and then subject fans to an indefinite wait, the network has decided to wait till after the strike is resolved.

But in addition to disappointing fans, this delay carries major ramifications for the War on Terror. Many of the Bush administration's real-life interrogation techniques have been modeled on the fictional Jack Bauer's questioning styles.

Giving Neanderthals A Bad Name

Friday, November 24, 2006

At Least Colonel Klink Never Built Naked Human Pyramids

There is a move afoot in Germany to possibly charge Donald Rumsfeld and other American officials with war crimes for their roles in the Abu Ghraib prison scandal. The probe is still in its preliminary stages and by no means a certainty.

Still, when Germany starts accusing you of war crimes, you know you're in some serious shit.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006