If I Had A Hammer, I'd A-Hammer The Cable Company

While at the wedding, I had the pleasure of meeting one of my personal heroes. No, no, not Britney Spears. Rather, it was a woman named Mona Shaw. I even went as far as to ask for her autograph.... Several times. She finally relented just before I was served with the restraining order. She was there because she's a member of the local Unitarian congregation that hosted the ceremony, as is the couple who were getting married.

Last fall 75 year old Mona and her husband found themselves getting jerked around by cable giant Comcast. First the company's technicians were late for an installation; then when they finally did show up, they only did half the work, etc. Sadly, Comcast is well known for treating customers like they were steaming piles of doggy-do, so the Shaws probably shouldn't have been surprised.

Anyway, with their cable service now cut off entirely, the couple went to the local Comcast office in Manassas, Virginia and asked to speak to the manager. They were told to wait, which they did.... For several hours.... Until someone finally told them the manager had left for the weekend.

The following Monday Mona grabbed a hammer--and her husband--and headed back to the Comcast office. When they tried to brush her off again, she took the hammer and started smashing keyboards and computers. Several cops eventually showed up, as well as the rescue squad. During all the excitement, Shaw had begun hyperventilating and her blood pressure shot up.

In my defense, I'll just say that I wasn't the only starstruck idiot there. At least two other people also asked her for autographs.