Puppet On A String

My favorite movie from last year is finally out on DVD, and no, it's not Shrek 2, The Incredibles, Spiderman, The Passion of the Christ, or Seed of Chucky. Then again, I haven't seen any of those, but that won't stop me from forming an opinion.

But one that I did see, and found to be absolutely uproarious, was Team America. It pretty much bombed at the box office (Total of $33 million, ranked 84 for the year), but that was because the film was so poorly promoted.

Team America was made by the same jokers who brought us South Park, and the humor in it is every bit as immature, gross and vulgar. But beyond that, it's also a great satire. The "team" is an elite squad of commandos who go around the world fighting terrorists. In the process, they inadvertently topple the Eiffel Tower, destroy the pyramids of the Egypt, and kill hundreds--if not thousands--of innocent bystanders. Then they act bewildered when everyone ends up hating them.

Their actions are, of course, condemned by the liberal Hollywood elite such as Michael Moore, Alec Baldwin, Susan Sarandon, and Tim Robbins.

Along the way, the movie covers pretty much every stereotypical plot device you find in action movies. The highlight for me, at least, was the speech about the three types of people in the world: Pussies, dicks, and assholes. It was truly moving, and left me in tears.

Another highlight was the sex scene, which actually had to edited to bring the theatrical release down to an "R" rating (The uncut version is supposedly on the DVD). Personally I've never done it upside down on top of the dresser, but apparently it can be done!

Oh, and did I mention that all the characters are marionettes? That's right: Puppets. On strings. And you haven't truly lived until you've seen a Michael Moore marionette with a chile dog in one hand, a big gulp in the other, and various food stains down the front of his shirt as he is interviewed on TV.