Will Ducking Help?

Astronomers using a sophisticated telescope have determined that the Andromeda Galaxy, located a mere two million light years from Earth, is three times as large as previously thought. The team of scientific geek types based their conclusion on careful observations of stars along the edge of the galaxy.

Meanwhile, geophysicists here on Earth, using exacting GPS measurements and highly detailed infrared satellite photography, have concluded that Michael Moore is also three times as massive as previously thought.

However, none of this may soon matter as NASA's Deep Impact space probe will soon deliberately crash into the Tempel One comet. The resulting debris field is expected to yield a treasure trove of information about the makeup of comets. These heavenly objects are believed to have seeded the primordial Earth with water billions of years ago. Curious scientists, never content to leave well-enough alone, have decided to go mucking around with celestial mechanics in an effort to further expand our horizons of knowledge.

The impact between the probe and Tempel One is scheduled to occur at 1:52 A.M. eastern time tomorrow morning. Scientists insist that the collision will in no way alter the orbit of the massive comet.

Let's these are NOT the same scientists who once accidentally destroyed a Mars probe because they failed to properly convert metric units into english.

On the other hand, if they're wrong, at 1:53 A.M. we can all begin running through the streets and screaming for our lives as giant fiery shattered comet chunks rain down upon us.