Space, The Final Frontier

Back in the early 70's, NASA launched two probes towards the outer solar system. Known as Pioneer 10 and Pioneer 11, the craft long ago exited our little group of planets. However, scientists heavily armed with data, horn rimmed glasses, and pocket protectors have continued to keep tabs on the pair. That is how they came across something now called "the Pioneer Anomaly."

Even though the probes are billions of miles from a place called Earth, they are still some 240,000 miles short of where they should be. Unable to get dates, the scientists instead sat around crunching numbers and determined that even after allowing for all known gravitational forces, the spacecraft are not quite where they should be. The only explanation appears to be some previously unknown gravitational force which they have dubbed the Pioneer Anomaly.

AH-HA!!!!!

This proves what I've been saying all along: Gravity is just a theory! And you know what else is a theory? That whole evolution thing. These findings give new credence to my belief in creationism. They also provide new evidence to support my belief that man and dinosaur once roamed the Earth simultaneously, and that The Flintstones is actually a documentary series, and that there really was a person known as Betty Rubble, and boy, was she one hot babe!!!!!

By the way, has anyone else noticed that "creationism" and "cretinism" rhyme? Just a thought, not a prayer.