Wednesday, November 19, 2003

NEWS FLASH
There is late breaking word that Michael Jackson has mounted one of his pet llamas and is leading police on a wild low speed chase towards the Mexican border.

POOR CBS
The suits at CBS has been having a rough month. Under intense pressure from Republicans and other red-blooded Americans, they recently pulled the Reagan movie from their schedule. That move, in turn, set off howls of protests and charges of "caving in" from the America hating Democrats.

Now with yesterday's raid at Neverland Ranch, the fate of the network's planned Michael Jackson special--tentatively scheduled for next week--is uncertain. If the network airs it, they run the risk of offending anyone and everyone with a minimal of sense common decency. But if they again cave in and yank the program, then they risk alienating 45 year old men who log into teen chatrooms and pretend to be 14 year old cheerleaders.

Such a dilemma.

Despite all the controversy, the network is sure to preserve at least some of its former dignity with tonight's Victoria Secrets special.

LONDON PROBING
Word is that authorities in London probing a security breach at Buckingham Palace. Heck, it was probably just Prince Charles looking for his butler.


----------Oliphant



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