Better Cancel Next Week's Picnic

'The A-Trek'

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you crossed the A-Team with Star Trek? Well, wonder no more!

Never Ask a Vulcan for a Neck Rub

By Any Other Name

In what may be the stupidest damn thing since the introduction of New Coke back in the '80s, the Sci Fi Channel has changed its name to: The Syfy Channel. Yes, it's still pronounced the same. It's just spelled differently, so that somehow makes it better.

The good news is that they will still continue to offer original science fiction programming, including movies that look like they were made on a budget of five bucks.

Boldly Starting at the Beginning(WARNING: Some Spoilers Ahead)

I was able to catch a 7 PM showing of Star Trek last night. And while it wasn't at matinee prices, it was well worth the extra three bucks.

As pretty much the entire world knows, the cast is entirely new. The only exception to that is Leonard Nimoy, who plays an old Spock thanks to some time warp thingamajig. At the same time, the movie did manage to avoid the classic time travel story that has become so tiresome. The writers simply established an entirely new Trek timeline and left at that. There was no going back and setting everything right.

My one complaint about this aspect of the movie is that the two Spocks eventually meet and the universe doesn't end!!! That seems to run counter to everything science has taught us over the years.

It's refreshing to have young, physically fit characters running around, getting into fights, and leaping from spaceships towards the planet below. It certainly gives new meaning to the word "skydiving."

The movie starts appropriately enough with the birth of the familiar James T. Kirk, and he immediately begins hitting on the cute olive skinned female baby in the adjacent crib. Kirk's mother turns out to be the hot Cameron Chase character from TV's House. Fortunately, however, Doctor House was not Kirk's dad.

Over the course of the next half hour we--and Kirk--end up meeting people like McKoy (who wastes no time bitching about space travel), Sulu (who again shows off his fencing skills), Chekov, and Uhura. Predictably, Kirk's first encounter with Uhura is in a bar where he unsuccessfully hits on her. Much to his consternation, she later gets the hots for Spock.

But the highlight of the movie comes when we finally meet Scotty, played by Simon Pegg (Shaun of the Dead). Although the character borders on raving lunacy, he's already an engineering genius.

I'll pass on describing the storyline any further, except to say that it works. This new Trek is an action packed two hours with some tremendous special effects. It should also appeal to non-Trekkers, mainly because it doesn't assume that you already know the characters.

Where No Nerd Has Gone Before

The new Star Trek movie opens tomorrow. Needless to say, it's already catching flack from longtime fans. And is it just me, or does the Klingon chick in the video kinda look like Susan Boyles?

Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

'Not Your Father's Star Trek'

I am SO looking forward to May 8!

One Final (Probably) Thought on the BSG Finale

TooManyTribbles has an excellent post on Battlestar Galactica. It addresses both the appeal of the series as a whole as well as the disappointment of the finale.

Couldn't have summed it up better myself.

Out with a Fizzle

Yesterday I wrote that I was bracing myself for what I feared would be a disappointing finale to Battlestar Galactica.

So how did it turn out? Well, let's just say that the show fulfilled my expectations.

BSG: The Final Frak

For anyone who has followed the updated version of Battlestar Galactica for the last several years, tonight is the night. The show wraps up its five year run on the Sci-Fi channel. If you avoided watching the show simply because you hated the cheesy series that aired some 30 years ago, shame on you.

The updated version has been nothing if not dark and depressing with allegories to our post 9/11 society. Episodes have explored prisoner torture, terrorism, civil liberties, kangaroo courts, and the conflicts that can arise between a civilian government and its military leaders. One early episode dealt with a life and death decision over whether to destroy a civilian liner that may have been hijacked by Cylons and sent on a suicide run against the human fleet. Ultimately, the ship was attacked and blown up, with a lot of second guessing afterwards.

Another story arc had the humans settling on a planet only to be occupied by the Cylons. The human resistance grew even as other humans cooperated with their Cylon occupiers. Once freed, the resistance leaders took it upon themselves to exact justice against those they viewed as collaborators. In many ways, that storyline was ripped from the real world headlines about Iraq.

There was also a big shocker in last week's episode: One character is seen using a cordless phone (if you've been watching, you'd appreciate the joke).

And if you're thinking that tonight is the night they find Earth, boy, are you out of the loop. That ship sailed at the end of last year. Not only did they find Earth, they discovered it to be a lifeless cinder destroyed by nuclear war some 2000 years earlier.

This final batch of episodes (technically the second half of season four) has only become more intricate and confusing. Turns out that not only had the Earth been nuked, it happened during an earlier Cylon war. That raised the strong possibility that the existing human race were actually Cylons themselves. That issue remains unresolved at this point.

And in another major plot twist, fighter pilot Kara "Starbuck" Thrace finds her own remains on that scorched Earth. That little discovery completely freaked out even the normally unflappable Cylon that was with her at the time. Again, no real explanation has been offered so far.

So tonight's two hour finale has a lot of loose ends to tie up. The writers have clearly set themselves a high bar. Whether they can live up to expectations and wrap everything up in a satisfying manner remains to be seen.

Personally I'm bracing myself for a major disappointment. That way, if tonight's episode does turn out to be a dud, at least I won't feel let down. On the other hand, if it turns out to be the best two hours ever written for television, I'll be pleasantly surprised. Either way, I win.

More reading:
Story: Internal Battles Raging in 'Battlestar'
10 Greatest Science Fiction TV Show Endings Ever
12 Plotholes That Must Be Filled in the Battlestar Finale
10 Business Lessons From 'Battlestar Galactica'

When Star Trek Fans Go Bad

Police in Colorado Springs are looking for a man who tried to rob a couple of convenience stores the other night. Nothing noteworthy about that, except that the guy was trying to use a "bat'leth."

If you have to ask what that is, you've obviously moved out of your parents' basement. A bat'leth is a Klingon sword. Before you laugh, consider that a full sized one is about three feet long and shaped like a crescent with points on either end. There are two more points along the razor sharp inside edge and a handle on the outside.

And yes, it is rather pathetic that I know exactly what a bat'leth is.

Star Trek Meets Monty Python

The Frakkin' End Is Near

No, not of the world. Don't get your hopes up on that. Rather, it's the the end of Battlestar Galactica that's near. The final episodes will begin airing on January 16th.

In case you need a refresher course, here's a quick summary of what's happened so far:

Found @ Too Many Tribbles

Well, Vulcans Are Known forTheir Problem Solving Skills

If Only We Could Blame the Klingons

New Star Trek Trailer

And unless we're intentionally being misled by one of the scenes, the young Kirk wastes no time blowing up his new ship.

Imperial Fleet Week in San Francisco

How come you never see the mainstream corporate media types covering news events like this?